Update from TiredLand

There are so many things I have been wanting to write about all that has happened in the last week.

But I'm just so tired.

I have heard of women who have had more than four C-sections. For me, #4 was probably a little past the reasonable limit. I have little tidbits of conversations with the doctor running through my brain from the time I was in the hospital. "Thin layers." "Adhesions." "Basically, you have no stomach muscles left." "Smart decision this is your last."

It's definitely been a slow recovery. I'm not sure if my expectations are too high. I just feel like my body is working much harder to mend itself back together.

I ended up spending four nights in the hospital, rather than three, for what looked like an infection in my incision. I think it might have been an allergic reaction to the surgical tape. Whatever the case, it was a minor complication that stalled my recovery.

At the same time, I'm sooooo thankful to have little BabyCake with us. I finally feel like our family is complete.

She is just so one of us.

She looks like a perfect mixture of all three of our other children. She is super sweet in her little baby way.

She and I are working together to help her get enough sleep. She was kind of cranky the first two days. I finally figured out she just wasn't warm enough to sleep as long as she needed.

I remembered an old trick someone had told us with our first son, who was born in November. You put a heating pad down on the sheets to heat them up before you lay Baby in the crib. (Of course, you remove the heating pad first!) Then, when she hits the sheets, they aren't cold, which wakes her up.

Also, her hat. It's an absolute must to keep the little bald head toasty warm when she hits the sheets.

Now, I've been getting some good three hour stretches of sleep out of her. The trick is to shut down my brain so I can sleep during that time, as well.

I'm trying my best to make sure the other three children get nutrition. But everything else is pretty much on hold. We do a little bit of school work each day when we are just hanging out anyway. We might as well do something productive. The kids love piling on my bed and taking turns holding Baby while we read Astronomy or another subject.

My goal today is to move as little as possible. I would really love to wake up in a few days feeling just a little energy again.

Until then, I'm just glad to be on this side of the process. I'm so happy to be able to hold her in my arms and see her cute little face. And everyone else in the family is completely in love with her, as well.

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You've come a long way, baby

It was kind of interesting returning to the world of pregnant people after five years of normal life. I can't believe how much things have changed.

I sort of imagined myself as an undercover reporter on assignment as a pregnant woman to learn how much society has advanced in the last five years. OK... not really.

First, there are the maternity clothes. When I had my other children, major retailers were just starting to add maternity sections to their lines of clothing. Thankfully, we had already made it through the days when tent-like dresses with the worst, unflattering floral were the "style" for pregnant women.

Now, pregnant women can buy their clothes at The Gap, Old Navy and Hot Mama. In fact, some of the maternity clothes are so cute, I'm sort of sad I won't be able to wear them anymore. Sort of.


Another discovery I made was the cute "diaper bags" women can now choose from. When I had my other three children, the hospital gave us a free diaper bag that was bright yellow and blue with a Pooh Bear print. Or maybe it was butterflies. Whatever it was, it really stuck out and screamed "diaper rash"!

This time, the hospital gave us a cool, black sling bag that even my husband is happy to carry.



Of course, all of the baby tools, toys, bedding, strollers, swings and chairs now come in a variety of hot color combinations. I'm especially fond of the pink and brown look.

Finally, the best part. The hospital photos.

We still jokingly call my oldest son's hospital photo his "prison photo". The photographer lined up the babies in their bassinets, covered them with the white hospital blankie with the blue and pink stripes and took one shot looking straight down at the baby.

When we got the photo in the mail a few weeks later, we couldn't believe it. He had the most awful, mad look on his scrunched up face that only a baby can make right before he lets out a scream.

Now, the hospitals hire outside companies like BellaBaby to do a photo shoot with the baby. The photographer actually spends about 30 minutes in your room, putting the baby in various poses and offers the photos in black and white or color.

How could we resist buying the CD with all of the photos, giving us rights to copy, print and reproduce them however we like?

So, what do you think? Have I convinced any of my AMA friends it's worth returning to the world of pregnancy? OK, then. How about one look at this face?


** I asked the photographer why she didn't try to hide the Band-Aid and the ankle tags in the first photo of the feet. She said that she was documenting the process and those things are part of being in the hospital. **

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True tales from the OR

Several people have stopped by my hospital room to apologize today. Hospital staff people. I think the last one said she was the head of the surgery department.

It was a full moon the night the baby was born. And wow! You could tell.

When we arrived at the labor and delivery floor, it was actually quite peaceful. I was nervous, as I always am, about having a C-section. I had a really bad experience with my firstborn during surgery, and it has left me jittery even nine years later.

All was going perfectly until the end when the doctor was sewing my incision.

Another doctor flew into the operating room and called to my doctor, "We need your help!"

He looked up at her with this look of, "Hello? In case you didn't notice, I'm performing surgery here."

I was thinking, "Umm. Excuse me? Can they really DO that?"

The woman yelled, "We have a 25-week baby being delivered breach. We need you NOW!"

My doctor looked shocked, but he started to move.

Now, I was thinking, "OK. The whole reason I have chosen this doctor is because of his ability to do a C-section and sew me up nice and neat and here we are to the sewing part and he's leaving. Humph."

"It's OK," my midwife assured me.

Then I realize that the mom in the next room needed my doctor a lot more than I did at that point.

A few minutes later, and he was back.

We found out the next day that my doctor probably saved that baby's life. He or she was half out of the mom feet first and unresponsive. He delivered the baby in a matter of minutes. The other doctors were able to revive the baby, and we heard that the little one was doing OK.

We also heard today that my doctor is one of the best in the hospital at delivering breach babies, and since he was the closest doctor to the situation, that is why they called for him.

We're all glad it didn't happen five minutes earlier when he wouldn't have been able to leave my surgery.

The craziness continued the rest of the evening with twins being born and several more emergency C-sections. I was glad to be the calmest case of the night. And thankful that everyone was OK.

No need to apologize.

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Peace

What more can I say?

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Introducing...

The one...


the only...



the cutie pie, the perfectly sweet baby...


Jayda Grace
7 lbs, 2 ounces
20 inches

Born TUESDAY, Dec. 1 at 8:40 p.m.

(Here's the BEFORE shot...)


We're both doing well... I've been wrestling with my post-surgery recovery a bit more than usual.

I had a feeling she wanted to be born before we had everything so perfectly timed for Dec. 3.

And it was a full moon...

When I went for my weekly appointment, her heart rate was bouncing around like crazy. My doctor decided we should be safe and go straight to the hospital.

She was born safely by C-section, with no complications. Thank you so much for your prayers!

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Make-ahead cookie dough

What is this strange force that takes over the mind and body of a woman in her final days of pregnancy?

It makes no sense. She feels about as poorly as she ever will. Her back and legs hurt. She should be sitting with her feet up.

And yet, she can't sleep until she cleans the linen closet. And washes the washing machine. And organizes the kitchen cabinets.

And makes meals to put in the freezer.

That darn nesting instinct.

It takes over all rational thinking and nothing can stand in it's way. Not even a few contractions will stop this woman from cleaning a closet that has been messy and unorganized for five years... since she had her LAST child.

Wouldn't it be great if the nesting instinct kicked in right BEFORE pregnancy began? Wouldn't it be wonderful if a woman's psyche could tell her she needed to make 16 freezer meals and scrub the bathtub BEFORE she became nauseous, moody and fatigued?

Oh, no. It waits. It waits until she has zero natural energy and every cell is in pain. Then it kicks into gear with a last-minute surge of adrenaline, allowing her to complete VERY important tasks, possibly life-saving, preventative tasks... like making chocolate chip cookies balls.

And that, my friends, is actually the point of this post.

Among the million other crazy things I have been trying to accomplish the past few days, I could not rest until I took care of the cookie dough. I read this tip somewhere else, and I love it.

I know. Most normal people simply buy break-and-bake cookies. But due to allergy issues, most of those are off limits for us. And besides, I love homemade chocolate chip cookies.

But instead of baking the whole batch, I only bake one pan. Then I scoop the rest of the dough onto a cookie sheet covered in wax paper. Freeze the dough until it is hard. Place the dough balls in a freezer bag.

Now, you can grab a handful and bake them when the craving strikes. I even will bake just five at a time in my convection toaster oven so we can each have a nice warm homemade chocolate chip cookie with our lunch.

Hey, it works for me! And now, I can rest easier tonight, knowing that when the baby is crying and the children are fighting, at least I can have a warm cookie.

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Just say YES!

I've been working hard lately to improve my skills at saying, "yes".

I love to do things for other people. I love that great feeling you get when you drop off a meal for someone or do something unexpectedly nice for someone in need.

But I'm not very good at accepting help. I always have an excuse.

"Oh, we'll be fine."
"You don't need to do that."
"Seriously, we can do it on our own!"

In the last few months, a lot of people have offered to help us in various ways. Since my husband hurt his back, and I have been in the last stage of pregnancy, we have needed help with a few things. And I realized that my gut instinct of refusing help was actually hurting others.

First, it robs someone else of the blessing of doing something nice for someone.

Second, it allows my pride to take over the situation. When I constantly try to convince people we don't need help, I am only fooling myself.

So, I've been trying to make it a habit to automatically say "yes" to whatever people offer. Of course, there have been times when the situation wouldn't allow me to say "yes". But I'm getting better at saying "yes" immediately, without even thinking about all the reasons I could say, "no, thanks".

"Can I take your kids for the weekend so you can get some things done around the house?" YES!
"Can I take a few days off work and help you when you have your baby?" YES!
"Can I mow your lawn?" YES!
"Can I watch your kids for you for a few hours while your husband is out of town?" YES!
"Can I go to the grocery store for you?" YES!
"Can I throw a baby shower for you?" YES!
And most recently, several people have said they would be available to watch my sick children if I go into labor earlier than expected. Even at 3 a.m. "OK... YES!"

I have successfully said "yes" on many occasions lately when it was difficult for me to resist the urge to make excuses for why I didn't need help. I mean, there's always Peapod that can bring my groceries. And I'm sure I can pay some kid in the neighborhood to mow my lawn. I can get a sitter for my kids, really I can.

But how nice just to enjoy the kind gesture of a friend.

I'm also trying to improve my "yes-saying" skills in a few other ways. I am trying to stop feeling guilty the whole time someone is helping me and to stop going on and on about how unnecessary it was to do what they did. A polite "thank you" works much better.

How about you? Are you better at doing for other people or being on the receiving end? Have you ever been in a situation where you had to put down your guard and just say, "YES!"?

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