The Coupon

I had to run some errands this afternoon, and I decided to make a quick stop at my favorite clothing store.

I had one child at home sick, two watching a movie with him, and the baby was napping. My husband was working from home, which allowed me to leave for an hour. However, it had to be a quick trip because this kind of peaceful atmosphere might not last for long.

Before I left, I made sure I had The Coupon.

Yes. I had scored. It was for 30 percent off my entire purchase. That means I didn't have to worry about spending X amount so I could get X percent off. Doing all of that math in the dressing room makes me sweat.

Usually when I go shopping for clothes, I need a particular item and have to struggle to find just what I'm looking for. This time, I walked in and found about 10 things I didn't need, but absolutely loved! And with The Coupon in my purse, I was about to score some great deals.

At the top of my pile sat a couple of super cute sweaters. They weren't the total spring sweaters. But they weren't the heavy, woolen, 10-pounders I've been wearing lately to survive the 5 degree tundra around here. A really cute sweater would go a long way toward making me feel like I can make it through the rest of the winter. A really cute sweater might even make all of the runny noses and fevers in this house bearable.

I got ready to check out and gave The Coupon one more close look to make sure it was the one I needed. It was good until Feb. 4.

But it didn't start until... Jan. 27.

WHAT?!

I found a salesperson and made sure she saw my pile of potential purchases.

"It looks like I grabbed the wrong coupon when I left the house," I said, hoping she would offer me the coupon I know she had stashed in her drawer for wonderful customers such as myself. "Could you hold these items while I drive all the way home and get The Coupon."

"Sure."

Another salesperson asked about my pile to which I added another pair of jeans, just for good measure. I told her my sad situation with The Coupon.

"No problem," she said. "We will hold your items for you."

"Great."

"Thanks."

"A lot."

Now, what to do? There was no way I would have time to get back across town on Thursday when the coupon took effect. By then, my cute sweaters in my perfect size might be gone, anyway. But I wasn't possibly going to pay full price when I knew I had to have a coupon SOMEWHERE at home. Heck! One probably showed up in the mail today!

I know what the salespeople were probably thinking. I was kind of dressed up. I looked like I might even have one of those jobs people go to during the day. I probably looked like I had all the time in the world to go clothing shopping in the middle of the day.

Would it have helped if I explained that I NEVER get to leave the house in the middle of the day? That I homeschool? That I usually wear a sweatsuit all day and carry a baby on my hip? That it was so rare for me to so easily find these articles of clothing in my size that I love? That I'm in a state of depression from the BITTER COLD AND THE ONLY THING THAT WILL SAVE ME IS THAT CUTE SWEATER?!? THAT I LIVE 20 MINUTES AWAY AND MY HUSBAND IS GOING TO DIE IF I TELL HIM I HAVE TO DRIVE BACK TO THE MALL TO USE THE COUPON?!?!?

So, I drove home. I found The Coupon.

It expired yesterday.

I had one dumb coupon that doesn't start for two days and another that expired yesterday. HOW could I possibly have let this happen? Maybe I should start programming The Coupons into my iCal?!

With some quick thinking, I went online and signed up to receive discounts by mail. I begged my e-mail to ding with the signal my 40 percent off coupon had arrived. But the best I got was an introductory coupon to save $25 off a $75 purchase. (My pile was a bit taller than that, I'm sorry to admit.)

Good enough. Movie still playing. Baby still sleeping. Sick child not puking.

Back I went.

The salesperson looked shocked that I actually returned. I showed her the meager coupon and explained that USUALLY the store sends ME the BEST coupons, not this lousy one for $25.

"OK, I've got a 40 percent off you can have," she said.

"NOW you tell me."

But, I must say. That sweater is cute. And think I can survive February now.