A minor glitch and a few small problems

There's one thing I always say about pregnancy: It's a good thing women forget how miserable it is or no one would have more than one child.

Of course, I'm being sarcastic. I know that pregnancy can be a beautiful and wonderful experience for a lot of women. I actually love the three months in the middle. But the third trimester feels like the longest year of my life. And that's not good, considering I'm only a couple weeks into it.

If you've ever experienced the third trimester, then your mind probably blocked out all of the aches and pains that came with it. I know mine did. Now, all of those repressed memories are coming back like a flood.

Every week, I take a minute to read about "what I should expect this week" on babycenter.com. They always have some good advice.

For example, this week, the writers tell me that if I would like to avoid some of those unmentionable aches and pains, all I need to do is try not to spend long periods of time standing or sitting down.

Well, I can only walk for about three minutes, so I guess my only option is to lie down. All day. Perfect. I'm sure that will work just fine.

On top of that, I keep making the mistake of reading all of the updates on how dangerous the H1N1 virus can be to pregnant women, especially in the third trimester.

The Centers for Disease Control is recommending that pregnant women get the vaccine both for the regular flu and H1N1. I am reluctant because most of the vaccines contain Thimerosal, a preservative that contains Mercury.

The medical community says Thimerosal is safe both for children and unborn babies. However, families affected by autism believe that the preservative is the reason for the dramatic rise in autism over the last couple of decades. They advise against getting an immunization that contains the preservative.

Regardless of whether Thimerosal is directly linked to autism, it just doesn't sound healthy to me to inject my body with Mercury. Call me crazy.

So, that leaves me with the other option suggested by the news reports. I can just stay away from all people.

My 8-year-old had to go to my doctor's appointment with me today, and he heard me discussing the issue with my doctor. Later my son gave me a good piece of advice.

"Just make sure you don't use handrails, Mom. That is where you are going to get a lot of germs," he said. "If you feel like you need to use a handrail, then you could try doing the crab walk."

All-righty then.

Lie down. Avoid human contact. And when necessary, do the crab walk.

I think this will work.

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Seven!

We celebrated my middle child's seventh birthday on Sunday.

Seven?! Doesn't that sound so much older than 6? It seems like it marks the transition from little kid, kindergarten boy to KID kid, first grader, who wants to understand all that is happening in the world.


After a BIG weekend dedicated to him, the other two kids and I came up with a list of seven things we love about our middle child.



He is such a snuggle bug. If I need a hug or a kiss, he is always willing to give me a snuggle.

He is very detail oriented. He wants to understand the WHY of how things work.


He is silly and crazy and makes everyone laugh.

He is kind and thoughtful, always thinking of others.


He is very intelligent. He learns easily and loves math.

He is loyal and a faithful friend.


I LOVE that boy's smile!


When we were done with our list of 7, he told us we could play a "bonus round" and go all the way to 20. Of course, we were more than happy to come up with 13 more reasons we love him!

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That girl

The moment my daughter was born five years ago, I thought something must be terribly wrong.

"Why isn't she crying?" I asked the nurses. I couldn't see what was happening because I had a C-section and my view was blocked as the doctor finished the surgery.

"She's fine," my midwife assured me.

Nothing was wrong. She was just so easy going that she didn't even cry the moment she was born.

Actually, I was just getting a taste of the five years to come.



This little girl is almost always happy.

The other four of us in the family often joke about how boring our lives would be without her.


She makes us laugh. She is full of love.


She's so cute. We love to just look at her, especially when she dresses up in funny outfits.


She's out-going. And, yes, out-spoken. She definitely likes attention.



She is fearless. A daredevil. And very athletic.


She makes friends easily.


She is full of life. Her excitement is contagious.


She is fun and funny. She is such a sweetheart.


We all look forward to the moment she wakes up in the morning and emerges from her beauty sleep. She always has something cute to tell us.


She is full of joy and spreads her happiness to all of us who are blessed enough to be around her every day!



I can't believe my baby girl is 5!

Happy Birthday!!

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paying for compliments {how-to instructions}

"Mom, I like you because you are creative, funny and beautiful."

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I will admit that many times I come up with parenting ideas that sound life-changing, but I am only able to implement them for two days before I get lazy and give up.

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"Mom, I like you because you play games with me, and you are nice."

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But this one idea has stuck. And let me tell you, it brightens my morning on a regular basis.

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"Mom, I like you because you are smart."

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I created chore charts for my kids. One of their chores is to give each member of the family a compliment. They also have to hug their mom and dad.

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"Mom, I like you because... because... I love you mom."

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They each get paid 5 cents per chore. And it's worth every penny.

Here's how I made the chore charts for my kids.
You'll need:


12x12 cardstock

cute printer paper (I bought mine at Jo-Ann's Fabrics)


Self-seal laminating sheets


Print out the words and grid for your chore chart on the decorative paper. Cut the cardstock to the size of the laminating sheets. Center the decorative paper on the cardstock and glue to hold in place.

Use the self-laminating sheets to hold it all together. Put magnet strips on the back if you want to place the chore chart on your refrigerator.

Our charts have the child's name at the top: "Emily's Chores" with clip art of a stick figure to represent that child.

Currently, our chores are:
Clean room
Make bed
Laundry in basket
Set table
(Clear) Dishes from table
Pick up outside
Pick up towels
Hug Mom and Dad
Give compliments
Plus one empty space for an extra chore that rotates each week. These include: Bathroom cleaner, Laundry helper and Kitchen helper.

I have used other chore charts in the past, but I like making my own because I can create new ones if I want to update the chores to fit our family.


Kids can use a dry erase marker to mark off the chores they have completed. I pay them 5 cents per chore at the end of the week. I think the most they could earn is $3 if they did every chore every day.

I started asking my kids to do their chores when they were about 3, but they were really able to do them on their own when they were 4. Would you believe that my kids actually race to do their chores each morning? They even compete to set the table first so they can mark off that chore.

I also have used the same template to make similar charts for homework or other projects.

Do you have a tip that gets your week off to a great start, brings peace to the household or is just an awesome idea? Please share! I would love to hear your ideas to make your home a happier place.

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This idea works for me! For more great ideas, check out Works for Me Wednesday over at We are THAT Family.

second grade economics

Save birthday money + Lose teeth + Do chores



= lots of change



= enough money to buy a new Star Wars Lego set

(He's been saving that money pretty much since birth.)


As opposed to 4-year-old Economics...

Use chore chart as coloring project


= No money


= Get photo taken with Barbie she found in the closet.

Mommy Economics

Kids who want things badly enough = Chores are done without complaining.

quotes of the day

7:25 a.m.
Five minutes left until it's time to leave for school. First Born opens his backpack and realizes he had a homework sheet to be completed over the weekend.

"Observations of a beautiful sunny, spring day:"

"What do you see around you? What do you feel when you're standing? What do you smell? What do you hear? Any other thoughts?"

First Born looks outside at a cloudy, dreary sky.

"Well, it's not sunny and beautiful. I don't have to do it."

With no time left, I have to agree.

12:15
Middle Child gets home from kindergarten.

"Your play is on Thursday! What kind of costume did your teacher say you should wear?"

"I'm supposed to wear sort-of old, stained clothing. Maybe I could wear my white uniform shirt with the chocolate stain on it. And I could wear my brown uniform pants with the grass stain."

"Perfect," I agree. "So, it's pretty much what you would wear to school anyway!"

3:15
Carpooling home from school. I notice a sheet in the backpack explaining options for summer camps.

"I don't want to go to any camps, Mom," First Born interjects.

"Why not?" asks carpool friend.

"My mom makes summer way more fun than any camp could be!"

Aww. Highlight of my day.

7 p.m.

Youngest Child laying on the floor.

"Someone folded up all of my edges!"

baby face

I hope you all had a wonderful Easter! What a beautiful day to celebrate the best day of the year -- Resurrection Sunday!

We actually had a visit from Mr. Streptococcus Bacterium. He was not a very nice guest. Instead of eggs and candy, he gave the kids fevers, delirious dreams, headaches and sore throats. No offense, but I'm hoping he doesn't decide to join us for any more major holidays.

I've been watching this year as my three children have been losing that sweet baby look to their faces. Sometimes I catch a glimpse of them out of the corner of my eye and it's as if I haven't seen them for months. "He's such a big kid now! Where did my baby go?"

Well, I have decided it's all about the teeth. When they lose those cute, little baby teeth, to be replaced by gargantuan adult teeth that seem way too big for their mouths, they are officially transformed into Big Kids.

Tooth fairy visits have become almost a weekly event between the two boys lately. And they both suffer from their own struggles with eating as they maneuver their food around loose teeth, missing teeth and new teeth cutting through the gums.


This is my daughter. She's four and has all of her baby teeth.


This is my 6-year-old son. He has an old man, gummy smile right now, without his top two teeth. Once those big ones grow in, it makes the ones to the sides look even more babyish.


This is my 8-year-old with his big, honkin' adult teeth in the middle. He's losing all four of he ones next to the middle teeth.

His baby teeth have roots of steel. That one on the bottom has been sticking out straight for over a month now while the one behind it grows in. We twist and turn that thing, but it won't fall out. It just stands straight out from his gum and rubs against his bottom lip.

He is definitely not a baby anymore.

Can we just take one look at this eye? He says the boys make fun of him for having such huge eyelashes.


I love those eyelashes.

for a limited time only

Mom, is that a dust mop? Because there was this guy and he found out after years of research that dust mops and vinegar can dull your floors. Regular mops scatter the dust all over your floors, but his mop doesn't scatter the dust. It picks up every last thing. It puts four layers of protection on your floors, so you still might want to clean it, but it won't ever dull it. It doesn't shoot water everywhere, it just shoots straight where you're going to clean.
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A few months ago, we canceled our satellite TV, and we put an antenna on top of our house.

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Mom, your plants... they're dying, OK? You need the Aqua Globe. You put water in it and then you put it in the soil and then for two weeks you won't have to worry about your plants. It will take out all the oxygen and return it with the water inside your globe. It's better than just hosing or watering. There's no dripping or cleaning up at all. It will save you a lot of work. You won't even have to worry about your plants for two weeks.
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Now the only kid's channel that we get is called Qubo. The kids love this channel. And I don't mind it because they actually broadcast Veggie Tales shows and 3-2-1 Penguins!

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Mom, you could really use some Space Bags. They don't let bugs or dirt go into the bag. When you take out the clothes they are just like they were the day you put them in. It keeps out bugs, dirt, moisture, water, insects, everything. It has four layers of protection, just like the mop.
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But all of the commercials are "As Seen on TV" advertisements. No sugar-coated cereals. No vacations in DisneyWorld. No action figures, Barbies or Fisher Price. Only these extra special items that can be purchased with a phone call. And you must call now.

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I really, really, really want some Bendaroos. You can bend them. Make them into a shoe lace. You can write your name with them, make them into fashion models. You can decorate with them. Bend them into a picture. Do the connect the dots. You can make clothes for your action figures. And they come with 5,000 of them, and you get two bags for free. You can straighten them again and use them over and over again. Please, Mom, please, can I have some Bendaroos?
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My kids love these ads. They recite them to me everyday. If I only had that thing that goes in the toilet, I could throw away my toilet brush for good.

The kids would never have to go on another shoe hunt if we had the shoe organizer. It will even organize our socks. My life would be so much easier.

Short on cash? No problem.

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Mom, do you have some gold sitting around that is just collecting dust? You can get the Gold Envelope. It's where you find gold that you don't want, and it's just collecting dust. You get their envelope and you put it in the envelope that they send you. You put it in the mail and the mail man or girl will pick it up and sell it to them and they will give you the cash.
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It's amazing what you can get for only $19.95. But for a limited time, it's only $14.95. And if you order now, you will receive an extra gift, absolutely free. That's right. Free. But you MUST. ACT. NOW.

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Mom, these can't be found in stores. You have to call right now. You have to use the number that is on the screen. Except for the Aqua Globe and the Space Bags. We found those in two different stores. You have to look hard, but you can find them in stores, Mom, you really can.
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So, today, in honor of April Fool's Day, for a limited time only and if you call right now, you can have it all. That's right. All of this.

But wait, there's more...

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For more funny posts in honor of April Fool's Day, visit Chocolate on My Cranium.

no more hykerspeed

You might remember a few months ago when my daughter, 4, kept demanding that I drive "hykerspeed".

Well, the questions about my driving keep coming, but she has significantly changed her requests.

"Mom, are you driving hykerspeed or regular speed?" my first mate asks from her big booster seat in the middle row of the minivan.

I'm going regular speed, honey.

"Good. Don't drive hykerspeed or you might get a ticket."

I know honey.

"And if you get three tickets, you will have to go to jail."

Yes, sweetheart.

"But you have to get three tickets in the same year. And you got the other two in different years. So you would have to get three more this year."

Uh-huh.

It seems that the two times Mommy was pulled over by a police officer in this sweet child's life have left a permanent scar on her brain. I must defend myself by explaining that 25 mph on a busy street in the Chicago suburbs is not appropriate for the situation and, quite frankly, is a speed trap.

And, by the way, if an ambulance is passing you on a two-lane rural highway late at night and it seems completely unsafe to stop on the side of the road because you are afraid another driver won't be able to see you and will rear-end you, you are wrong. You also can get a ticket for that!

In these situations, I do what any good mother of three would do as the officer approaches my driver's side window. I turn to the three children and say, "Please cry as loud as you possibly can." And, regardless of how much they HAD been crying previously, they now are completely quiet and sit like perfect angels while the officer writes the ticket.

But through it all, they have learned, and told the story, whether accurate or not, that you can go to jail if you get three tickets. But they must all be in the same year.

And with this possibility plaguing her thoughts, my daughter has now decided that she does not what me to drive hykerspeed under any circumstance.

So, you can imagine her shock this week when I did it.

I pushed. the. hykerspeed. button.

I was trying to make a very dramatic point and slammed my hand against the button to turn off the loud, blaring 80s music that I was attempting to sing along with, and as I did so, I hit the red triangle button. Instead of blasting through outer space and soaring through an asteroid field, our hazard lights came on.

Even I was stunned for a minute. Now what do I do?

I regained my senses and pressed the button again. Lights stopped flashing. We were still on earth.

Apparently, the hykerspeed button malfunctioned. But nonetheless, my co-pilot is adamant about warning me against its use.

"Mom, don't press the hykerspeed button. Remember when you slammed the radio and you pressed it? I don't want you to go to jail."

the boy in the blue

Our middle son loves to understand all the details of a situation. Today, he was trying to figure out who a certain student at his school is. My son is in kindergarten and this other boy is much older, so they don't cross paths that often.

"He's tall. And he has blonde hair," I tried to explain.

"Ohhhh... does he usually wear brown pants?" my son asked, as if a light had suddenly turned on. " And he wears a blue shirt?

"Yes, that's him," I agreed. "And sometimes he wears a white shirt."

By the way, all the students at his school wear uniforms: Brown pants with a blue or white shirt.

Hey... if that description works for him, then it's good with me.

get the kleenex box

This is my second born. We like to call him Love Bug Snuggle Hug. His love language is hugs. And kisses. And more hugs. Oh, and snuggles.

Today was the worst day of his life.

He's a shy one. It takes him a while to warm up to people. But once he does, he loves them with his whole heart. His is a powerful love that melts me on a daily basis.

He was nervous going to kindergarten this year. Really nervous. But he warmed up quickly to the second most wonderful woman in his life -- his teacher.

The young, beautiful, sweet teacher, with her southern accent and bonus prize box and big heart.

The same teacher who resigned today.

LBSH cried. And he cried. And then he started wailing. Then he moaned and cried. Then he just sobbed.

"I want my normal teacher," he cried, rejecting any talk of a substitute or a replacement who might just be the very best teacher on the entire planet.

I drew upon all of my mothering skills and realized immediately that it would have to be LBSH Day. You know, the day when he gets to decide everything and he can basically have whatever he wants.

Spiderman Mac and Cheese for lunch. Along with corndogs.

Hours glued in front of the computer playing games on the LEGO web site.

Mugs of hot chocolate.

Mickey Mouse pancakes for dinner. With lots of whipping cream and chocolate chips on the top.

Hershey bars for dessert. That finally made him smile.



Hugs. Hugs. And more hugs.

Oh, I know kids this age are resilient.


But this kid is what one might call attached. He still carries his baby blankie around the house and sets it on the front bench so I will bring it along when I pick him up from kindergarten.

His 4-year-old preschool photo is bent and smudged from all the time he has spent staring at it. He names off all of the children who are his "best friends", even though we haven't seen them for over a year. He begs and pleads with me to call the mothers of these children who have skipped off to kindergarten in other areas and most likely would not have a clue who I am.

He loves people with all his might. And she was top of his list.

We could be eating a lot of chocolate this week.

And giving lots of hugs.

I don't expect him to forget her anytime soon. And I have a feeling this won't be the last time I'll be nursing this one's broken heart.

sage advice from a young mind

"Mom, I think you should get the president to read your blog," my 8-year-old said.

Excellent idea! How do you think I should do that?

"Just fly to his house. Go up to him and show it to him."

That sounds good. What do you think he would do?

"He would comment."

"He would let you know if he likes it."

Perfect.

(I just wanted to let you all know I'll be in D.C. for a few days. I'll let you know how it goes.)

the hand(print)s of time

A few years ago, I saw this idea in a magazine. Each year, a mother would trace the hands of her children on a Christmas tree skirt.

It seemed like a project that would take a lifetime to finish. But I was determined and decided to give it a try.

The first year, our oldest son was 2 and our second child was a baby.


That year, the tree skirt was pretty bare. I didn't give up on this craft project, though, after only one year. And believe me, that is not my usual tendency with craft projects.

Two years later, their little sister's hands were traced on the tree skirt.



This year, the tree skirt is full!

It seemed like it was just a blink since the day I first traced those tiny little hands. Now, the youngest set of hands is 4 years old.

I'm not sure whether I should buy a larger tree skirt and continue the tradition. Or perhaps I could let them cover their hands in paint and start making hand prints, rather than tracing the hands.

Whatever the case, I'm glad I started this six years ago. And I'm glad I stuck with it. We have so many memories behind each outline of those hands.